Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

We are within a week of The Day Of Love. The day most single girls dread with every fiber of their being. It can be even worse if you've suffered a recent breakup and are facing The Day with especially raw emotions.

Enter: College BFF. 

As her shoulder during all world-ending, soul-crushing events (see: current pre-VDay breakup), I have come to realize that, as girls, we pretty much all handle this sort of thing the same way. 

No matter who you are, what your situation in life, or how long you were dating, unhooking is HARD.

After a breakup, here's what a week can hold:

- 7 times sobbing so hard you can't breathe.
- 14 times misting up but not quite losing it completely.
- 97 times starting to email, call, or text him.
- At least 1 time of hitting "send" with what you think is a breezy message.
- 600 times of manically re-reading the sent message and realizing it didn't sound breezy at all.
- 2 times actually being nervous that there is something wrong with you and you need to call a doctor because you think you are losing your mind.
- 750 times you can't look at something you previously enjoyed because it reminds you of him.
- 12 times of getting lost in a fantasy of your eventual reunion.
- At least once hoping that they are miserable to the point that they have explosive diarrhea and eyes so swollen from crying that they experience permanent loss of facial elasticity.

But then one day you are just too tired to cry about it anymore. The effort of the process just wears you out.

And that's ok. You don't have to stay mad.

Allow yourself to be grateful for what you had even though you don't have it anymore, and move on. At some point, happiness is a choice.

Choose it.

Valentine's Day is about love. No one said it had to be a significant other.

Throw on that hot dress, go out with your single girls, and have an amazing boy-free Valentine's Day with the girls you love. That's what I'll be doing. 

And here's to hoping we can make it through the list before then, because honestly, I'm exhausted from her emotions. (For those curious about my BFF, we are currently in the "I can't enjoy anything in my life because it all reminds me of him" stage.)


  1. Sounds like before your girls' night your BFF will need some cold teaspoons and anti puff roller on her eyes :( poor thing

    I'm glad I've seen more "JUST CELEBRATE LOVE" posts around this time of year and yours is fab. big puffy hearts to you.

  2. One of my favorite quotes I found when I went through my first heartbreak was this:

    Not all relationships are suppose to last a lifetime, some are suppose to end. The length of the relationship, or how it ends, is never wrong. It's simply life. They do what they are suppose to. When they are no longer needed, they are complete and successful. There are no mistakes in relationships. Everything unfolds the way it is suppose to."

    I read that quote a thousand times and it eventually clicked for me and helped me move on! Maybe you can pass it along to your gal!

  3. Break-ups stink! It's great when you get to the point where you realize that the break-up was just putting you one step closer to who you are supposed to be with.

  4. Oh wow. Now I remember why I missed your posts so much. Well done, my friend. "Valentine's Day is about love. No one said it had to be a significant other." Amen!! Some of my most fun Valentine's Days were spent in the company of my best girl friends. Wishing your college BFF better days ahead. And I hope y'all have a blast celebrating the love of great friends together!

  5. "She" is so blessed to have you for a friend. Have a good rest of your day.

  6. I agree with that. I am all about it is about love for those important to you.

  7. oh my gosh. These are so good and so true. I couldn't have described it better myself!

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